5kg of stuff, but all the kindness in the world

Pre-derby, the derby was this insurmountable beast full of hardcore people, fire-breathing horses, and unforgiving terrain. But post-derby, what sticks out in my memory are the countless small acts of kindness and tiny luxuries that happened along the way. Some were bigger and funnier (raggedy Andy, steppe beers from Nathan and many more) and will have their own posts, but I wanted to shout out a few of the tiny moments that people may not even know meant so much. There are way too many to count and speak of- but know that I remember much more than I can put here, and please keep in mind that it all matters- all of it.

One of the last days of the race, Marianne Finch (an absolute badass who rode from day 2 with a completely shorn in half thumb and an unknown GI bleed) was at the same horse station as I was midday. She was actually about to use the long drop and saw me hustling over and let me go first- we chatted for ten seconds and I learned she had to drop. I felt gutted for her and also concerned for her health, but she took it all in stride like she seemed to take everything during the derby. Leaving the long drop and washing my hands, she was standing outside a ger and offered me the last of her candy. Coke bottles with sour on them, and apple sour candies. I was SO excited. Let me tell you- these things saved me. They not only boosted my spirits, but they were also my only meal the last day since I was having a hard time with the Mongolian cuisine in the hot weather (terrible heartburn!). Thank you, Marianne, for the best candy I will ever have in my life.

Nancy, who everyone dubbed Mamanancy, had had to drop due to terrible asthma. She came back out on the steppe and lit up every horse station I saw her at with choco pies, cokes, and peppy pills (I think vitamin b but I can’t say I asked much at that point). She also had wet wipes to share and stories of wine country back home to dream of while sleeping. Mamanancy, thank you for being you.

I happened upon Wendy Oswood when I was at a terribly low moment, and I was also being self centered, not realizing she also was having a bit of a time before I cried at her. we had had maybe one or two convos previous but she took it all in and had some words of wisdom for me, and offered to alter her plan to take on some of what I was upset about. All after she had lost her horse and had a trip setback and was waiting for her belongings to show up! I will never forget that kindness, especially after learning how down she was as well!

Smiling faces also meant so much. Alexa, Eleanor, Cesca, Allison- seeing your faces and grins was always such a treat at the end of a long day. We were all going through it in our own ways and you guys seemed forever cheerful. Those smiles kept me smiling too.

I saw Bianca at the station before the finish, standing there with pocket donuts, offering to fill water and help with horses. She had her own stuff to work through and was instead spending her time helping everyone else.

A post about kindness and selflessness would not be complete without mentioning the Mongolians themselves - each camping family will get their own story for sharing their homes with us, but the herders and their families were also amazing. One station I was again crying at (Mongolia is now having some rain, thanks to all the moisture I shed there), and one of the women took me aside, filled my water, shoved rice pudding down my throat, and somehow made me laugh, and then put me on a questionably fast but very safe and “got the job done” horse that she said was her own. She treated me as if I was her granddaughter having a tough day and I am grateful for it.

I also saw so much sharing amongst my fellow riders- electrolytes from Alex when I was sweating salt, oatmeal in the morning when people had extra- or maybe didn’t but wanted to make someone smile. Wet wipes or toilet paper for the long drop. Waypoints shared with whomever wanted them. A surprise spice pack for the broth (still no idea where that came from but thank you). These all may sound small but these riders spent years agonizing over what went into their 5kg and most people cut out anything that didn’t have a specific use for them. So to share meant being selfless, being generous, being human.

The crew was also incredible. The vets cheered when people didn’t get penalties (if they thought you were doing right by the horses, of course), the translators were such rays of sunshine at every horse station- there with a smile or a joke, or even a compliment (even if undeserved- I was told my skin looked great but I think it was just a layer of dirt), Louise was always there with a “how you going?” And of course Stevie, with a hug and the exact right thing to say (somehow not grimacing at the smell emanating off of us).

I cherish all of these moments that happened to me, that I witnessed, and I know there are many more that no one will ever speak of again, but the derby really drove home that it all matters. How we treat others when we are the rawest version of ourselves is truly what makes us who we are, and these kindnesses are not ones I will forget - probably ever.